Rock

i could say i miss you but it wouldnt say make anything better
i could say that i want this pain to stop but it would not heal me
i cry out to God but He tells me to wait,
i want to cry but i do not feel the need
i do not want to feel weak
i try to hold onto what little sanity i have left
i try to clutch onto a dream that is not there
watching that dream slide away is painful
but i know i will only dream it again
i pray to my God and ask Him why
i hear the soft voice of my mother:
     "Its alright to cry my dear do not feel frightened,
       Its alright to feel like this my dear you wont forget me
       This feeling if only for a moment will fill this hole you need not worry about replacing me
       For i am your mother, my child i gave birth to you
       You my child are my stamp on the world"
After her voice fades i hear the Lord whisper to me:
        "My daughter i have a plan for you do not feel frightened, do not bury these tender feelings
          you may have been the rock for many but you yourself must find your rock,
          let me be one
          and other will come later"
So i hold my head up as my pained tears fall down
i try not to cry
but this emotion is to hard for me to bear alone
so i shall stand and await the day i can share with that other rock my Heavenly Father promised me
i will say to him:
         "What took you so long, can you hold me long and hard?"